The Bad Mom

Part of my glamorous career in radio involved making public appearances, which I hated. For me it was like: Hey I’m down here at CAR TOYS giving away concert tickets for Limp Bizkit. But one particular appearance was on our local morning television show. 3 DJ’S- me being one of them- were to race during AM traffic by freeway, streets and me riding on public transportation which was the light rail train.

There was a slight miscommunication with the live programming. I thought the producer said to hop the next train but what he meant was wait until they were live and then hop the next train. I had just ruined the race because I got a head start. I’m broadcasting from my cell phone on the train as the news chopper is flying overhead. The anchor couple is irritated calling me a cheater, the people I’m squished next to seem equally irritated. The producer tells me to get off on 1st street, walk to Waterfront Park to find some monument. I paced for miles in the wrong direction before the traffic chopper flew overhead as I waved my arms like I needed to be rescued not realizing the chopper is filming me making an ass of myself. The traffic reporter called my cell phone and said turn around your going the wrong way.

I retraced my steps to the monument where my co-workers sat irritated. They left and I got on the train. When I got back to the station, I got heckled and laughed at but never had to do make an appearance again.